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Perception and choice

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Perception and choice by Bryony Rowntree
“Paradigms power perception and perceptions power emotions. Most emotions are responses to perception – what you think is true about a given situation. If your perception is false, then your emotional response to it will be false too. So check your perceptions, and beyond that check the truthfulness of your paradigms – what you believe. Just because you believe something firmly doesn’t make it true. Be willing to re-examine what you believe. The more you live in the truth, the more your emotions will help you see clearly.”

From The Shack, by WM Paul Young 

Learning to separate out our beliefs (the things we’ve made up) and perception (the lens we are looking through) from the actual fact of the matter are essential life skills for all the relationships we have with other human beings, productivity, our mental health, the life we carve for ourselves, the person we become and for flourishing in life and work.

Laundry is a great example for this.  It’s something we all have to do, right?  It is a practical activity of washing clothes, drying them and putting them away.  How we see it is our perception.  For some, laundry represents stability and assuredness; they know what needs doing, how to do it and see a rhythm to it.  This perception usually brings with it an energy for action and productivity, meaning that the job gets done without stress or fuss.  For others, it’s chaos and never-ending; the ‘urgh’ feeling ensues and the project is avoided…..leading to a back-up that causes more problems.  At the end of the day, the thing itself is still the same thing.  We get to choose how we approach it and what we believe  it, and our abilities regarding it, to be.  This then impacts our energy, our mental health and other things that need doing in life. 

We so often have perceptions of situations, other people and our relationships with other people without even knowing it.  It is so easy to believe that that is how it is and not take the time to step back and take stock.  I do it myself.  I work with people frequently who do it and it stops them from stepping into something in life or from being able to change a pattern in a relationship or, heartbreakingly, from owning who they are, trusting themselves and sharing their uniqueness with the world.  I work with teams and see their perceptions about each other change; sometimes letting go of beliefs about other individuals that they have held for years.  I love witnessing people surprise themselves and each other and the curiosity about what is now possible begin to unfold. 

We so often have perceptions of situations, other people and our relationships with other people without even knowing it.  It is so easy to believe that that is how it is and not take the time to step back and take stock.  I do it myself.  I work with people frequently who do it and it stops them from stepping into something in life or from being able to change a pattern in a relationship or, heartbreakingly, from owning who they are, trusting themselves and sharing their uniqueness with the world.  I work with teams and see their perceptions about each other change; sometimes letting go of beliefs about other individuals that they have held for years.  I love witnessing people surprise themselves and each other and the curiosity about what is now possible begin to unfold. 

As we become more aware of the subconscious choices we make in how we perceive the world around us, we become more aware of the reactions (emotions, behaviours….) we attach as a consequence.  From this awareness, we gain access to choice about how we do want to see, experience and engage with the world around us.   

We get to create more flow. 

Photo by Anika Huizinga on Unsplash